between here and there.

cha-cha- change.

2008-05-21T01:50:00.000-07:00

"nothing is secure but life, transition, the energizing spirit." -ralph waldo emerson

well, emerson got it almost right... change, or transition, is indeed an ever- constant in life. but, so is my Jesus. without my Jesus, making it through these last two months and twenty four days of transition would be an almost, if not totally impossible task. i am so thankful for the unexplainable, incomparable, sensational love of Jesus Christ. in fact, i'm not just thankful for it; i'm crazy about it.

i leave tanzania august 12, 2008... yep, only two months and twenty two days to go. and, i'm wondering how to go about my last months... do i refuse to think about home and the exciting things that await me there as well as the things that just might scare me half to death? do i start facing my goodbyes here and treat everything as the last this or the last that? or do i continue to pirouette in this tiny little space, this little wrinkle in time between the ever approaching future and the ever fading past? at this present moment, i'm struggling. struggling to find the balance, struggling to find the words. and, all the while, i'mclinging even tighter to the hand of the One who leads me in this dance, the One who's always led me in this dance.

** i'll try to be better about this whole blogging thing. i promise i'll try. :)

if you blink, you just might miss it...

2007-04-23T11:11:00.000-07:00

and really, i guess it's up to you if you're wanting to miss it or not...

my list of various sights along the open road...

- camels
- donkeys
- men urinating
- potholes/ craters the size of texas
- women breastfeeding while sitting on large buckets

and, my favorite...

- the naked maasai man bathing along the side of the road.

(the rest might as well go without needing to be said)

** sidenote... we did in fact make it to moshi, our new home and are currently outside nairobi, kenya attending our yearly conferences.

greetings from kenya!

2007-04-01T23:29:00.000-07:00

i think i've forgotten to mention this... but... i have another blog, one with lots of pictures... and, it finally looks like i just might have decent internet access in the days to come... so, i might actually be updating these things a little bit more often.

the new blog... http://web.mac.com/rogersabigail (no need to put www. before it... it won't work that way)

and, that's really all for now... mina and i are currently helping out at a retreat center outside nairobi, kenya... this place is seriously gorgeous!

and now a picture... because i think i can actually get this thing to post one... unbelievable :)

mina and i... also featuring the baobab tree, my all-time favorite tree.

2007-03-23T05:18:00.000-07:00

Karibu Language Blunders 101!!

First lesson: Mind your Ki's, Vi's, P's, and B's...

i seem to have this reoccuring problem with the words "kipofu" and "kikapu." kipofu refers to a blind person, and kikapu refers to a basket. you'd think, well, at least those aren't commonly used words or anything. however, baskets seem to be the topic of many conversations, as iringa has a booming business of basket-weavers/ sellers. allow me to further elaborate by sharing a couple stories...

1. we had a village homestay about a month ago. one of the children was having a great ole time climbing around inside a few baskets outside his house. i was sitting, talking with his mother, and decided to point at the child and tell her how funny it was to see him playing and rolling around in the basket. yep, i pointed, laughed, and basically told her that her child was blind, and that i thought it was a pretty funny thing, to say the least... awful.

2. mina and i had the most amazing (insert thick sarcasm here) experience of riding the bus system about 8 hours from dar es salaam, tz to iringa, tz. about two hours into the drive, we stopped at a weigh station. venders are like a plague of locusts here, let me just start by saying that. well, when we stopped, about 10 guys stood outside my bus window, yelling at me to buy their baskets. i had my headphones on and my eyes closed. i was going to give off the appearance that i was sleeping. they began to bang against my side window and then, they took it one step farther by sliding their hands through the crack in the window to poke my arm. needless to say, it became a little difficult to ignore at this point. so, i hung my head out the window and shouted, "vipofu ni vizuri, lakini si taki." yep, i told them that the blind are good, but i do not want... needless to say, they did back away from the window and ran clear around to the other side.

3. (a bonus) a couple weeks back, we took a weekend safari to ruaha game park. when we arrived at our campsite/ rustic hotel, we all ordered cokes. well, i was the last in line to order, and so, falling in line with everyone else, i ordered a "coke pia," which means that i ordered a coke also. a few minutes later, out came an ice, cold glass of beer headed straight for me. yep, seems i ordered a cool glass of beer (bia)... yep, i have yet to live that one down.

4. (bonus number two) i was joking with one of the walimu (teachers) today and told him that he was a goat. the kiswahili word for goat is mbuzi. well, i was tired, lazy, and failed to clearly enunciate. basically, i called him a "buzi" instead. yep, buzi means sugar daddy... go figure!

i'm sorry that i am absolutely pitiful about updating this thing... just know that i am lifting up all of you and miss you often, but i must say that i love it here!! with all my heart!!

Mungu aku bariki!

** only 6 more days of class... not that i'm counting!

don't get me wrong, i do love the wilderness

2007-02-02T06:19:00.000-08:00

once upon a time... i was a woman. i had femininity. i smelled sweet. i wore pretty shiny red toenail polish, brushed my hair, and didn't reak of bug repellent. now, all femininity has left me. i have a constant ring of dirt around my ankles. i don't remember the last time i painted my toe nails. or the last time i actually looked at a mirror. or the last time i really brushed my hair. or the last time i smelled good, like, actually good. i fear what i will become in the next two years.

novelties that will soon wear off... not to be translated as "complaining" :)
1. au de 100% deet mosquito repellent
2. nightly wrestling with my mosquito net
3. using the restroom 5 feet from my front door because i fear walking to the restroom through the forest at night
4. "camping out" for four months straight
5. being called any famous white person... kwa mfano (for example)... children shouting "hey jLo" at me as i'm walking down the
streets
6. constant uber- size mosquito bites all over my ankles
7. fearing, day and night, the plague of malaria... see above number 6

** HE is ALIVE here in tanzania... i'm sure HE's always been working here, i think maybe i'm just beginning to get a little more tuned in to the fact.

- our M*sl*m teacher is asking questions every day... he has asked all of us to tell stories from THE BOOK in kiswahili, asked us to tell our stories of coming to know the Father in kiswahili, and helped us translate the L*rd's prayer today into kiswahili... i rest in the truth that as the rains fall and cover the earth and do not touch without producing results, so HIS Word refuses to touch null and void on "BIG I's" heart!! he is searching... ask that Father will show HIMSELF through dreams and visions!!

** sidenote... i have had the glorious opportunity of drinking 3 dr peppers (aka nectar of the gods) and 1 root beer this week... a big, big treat!!

- Mungu akubariki!

2007-01-13T03:41:00.000-08:00

"today i finally overcame trying to fit the world inside a picture frame. maybe i will tell you all about it when i'm in the mood to lose my way with words..." - JM, 3 X 5

** and just when you think your heart couldn't break anymore, that you couldn't laugh any harder, love any more deeply, cry any more tears, feel any more overwhelmed or confused, afrika happens :) the good days, the bad days, the mediocre days waiting for those golden opportunities to come around, they're all worth it. why? because, at the end of the day, i get to be here and do this and share this love that surpasses all understanding!!!

- ps... mina and i moved into our stone cottage yesterday... yes, i no longer live in a tent... and i am loving it!!

pps... check out mina's site (click on her name on the right hand site, for those of you unaware) for pictures and movies of all our many travels and adventures... i can't seem to get pictures up here, or maybe it's just that i don't have the patience... i'm banking on the latter :)

i'm dreaming of a white christmas... hey... a girl can dream, can't she?!

2006-12-20T06:02:00.000-08:00

habari za mchana...

good afternoon from the land of tanzania.. it's unlike any other place. some days i love it, some days, to be honest, i just daydream about running water, electricity, toilets within the same walls of my living quarters, reliable internet, connection with my family and rafiki, and, of course, starbucks grande soy caramel macchiatos... hey, i am being honest! but, every day, i realize that there really is nothing greater than being completely taken away from everything i ever knew as comfy and placed in those whole other realm, a realm in which i can see my Maker work in ways i have never seen Him work before. and it's not that He's never done anything amazing in my life elsewhere... i think that, well, maybe i'm just starting to get it a little... i'm beginning to catch a small, teensy weensy glimpse of what this life is all about... and it sure as heck isn't about me!

so.. here's to you, this krismasi season... may you experience the fullness of knowing the One who fully gave Himself so we could live, move, breath, dance, sing, laugh and cry... and above all, love Him with every iota of all we have :)

krismasi njema.. Merry Christmas!

sidenote... some of you all may have watched a little news lately... for those of you wondering if i and my fellow rafiki have been swept away by the hurricane/ cyclone, we are alive and well... lots of flooding, and the flooding seems to have brought out the panya (or mice/ rats), but, other than the three dead panya that have been taken captive by the traps and poison, all seems to be well here in very wet tanzania :)

2006-12-01T07:36:00.000-08:00

pole sana... very sorry... it seems it's been a few ages since i've updated, but... i've been living in a bush for a little while... which.... speaking of... i survived the 40 40 experience and loved every second of it, well, almost every second of it. i promise to update in a more in depth, less lazy fashion later... off to soak up a little more r & r at our resort outside lusaka, zambia. we head to victoria falls... who's excited?! i know i am!! rafting one of the seven natural wonders of the world, here i come!

pax to all, abby

karibu... that means welcome.

2006-10-27T00:06:00.000-07:00

i live in tanzania now. i live in tanzania. i keep trying to repeat this simple little phrase over and over again in my head... somehow, it has not become a complete reality yet. although, as each day grows a little bit closer, the reality begins to sink in... tanzania is my home now. and i find myself truly elated by that fact! it is good to be here. it feels so good and right to be learning kiswahili, although i still know very little. however, you'd be surprised with how far jambo, karibu, asante sana, mambo- poa, and zuri can get you. here i am called mzungu, which means white person. and, believe me, i have never looked whiter in my entire life. :)

today marks my one week anniversary of living in tanzania. exactly seven days and three hours ago i arrived at the dar es salaam, tanzania airport. time seems to fly by so fast... i have attempted to write about my different experiences as faithfully as i can and have reminded myself to take as many pictures as i can... however, some things in life just can't be still- framed.

currently, we are living in the uluguru mountains of morogoro. we'll be here for two more days before leaving to go to zambia. morogoro is zuri sana... very beautiful, and it is also very crowded. we have spent most of our time with our tanzanian dada (sister), aldofina. she's been teaching us kiswahili. well, she is at least attempting to teach us kiswahili. most of the time is spent in laughter... mostly aldofina laughing at us :) but, we love her and have had so much getting to know her and the language. i have this feeling i'm going to miss morogoro, but, lucky for us, we will be coming here for about a week or so after zambia before heading off to language school... so, goodbyes do not have to be said just yet :)

i hope to get some pictures up soon... internet is zuri sake (no good) here, and uploading pictures requires patience i just don't have right now :)

... remember that daddy is faithful. he was faithful yesterday, he is faithful today, and he will sure as heck be faithful tomorrow. praise his name alone! amena!

so close... but still so far away.

2006-10-02T15:26:00.000-07:00

i woke up this morning with a very nervous heart. no. not nervous in a bad sort of way. i guess it was more of an excited, i have goosebumps sort of feeling. i guess i'm having a hard time explaining it all... either way, the goosebumps just seem to grow every time i think about my africa. it's weird to feel something so strong and passionate for a people i have never even seen, a language that has never graced my lips, and a land i have never even dug my feet into, but it's true... i am in love with africa. i only desire that my love for africa will grow more intense as tanzania becomes my home for the next two to three years. i leave, as many of my fellow sojourners do, in less than sixteen days from today. the dream is so rapidly becoming a reality. and, through this process, i have seen my love be ever- faithful. to think... i murmured the words "oh, i'll go anywhere, but, no, never africa" just under a year ago. life's funny like that i guess. and now, well, i just can't see myself anywhere else. yes, it is true, in less than 18 days, i will be on african soil and will be considered a full- fledged african woman... ha!

2006-09-22T15:41:00.000-07:00

long awaited pictures from the pre- wedding of mrs. megan deshazo... 'twas a marvelous occassion. sidenote... jewels and suz, you were both missed by yours truly.

melissa, me, megs, kinsey, and tessa

** sidenote... i promise to upload more beeeautiful pictures of my beeeautiful friends later. my computer is driving me crazy and has caused me to lose all my patience for the time being :)

... but i just can't find the words

2006-09-07T20:11:00.000-07:00

every morning i get up. i journal, and this is how i talk with my maker. it's funny though. as of the past few weeks, the pages have been blank. i am experiencing so many different emotions, and i find myself struggling to capture them all. but, i want so badly to express all that my beloved is teaching me. so, i'll just let my friend sandra mccracken say it in words much more eloquent than i ever could...

"Springtime Indiana" by Sandra McCracken

Springtime Indiana
You are sleeping by my side Here across the miles we ramble
Past where the road divides
I wish I could tell you…but I just can’t find the words

I’ve never been good with my thoughts
And even worse with my words
But you read like familiar poetry
That I have never heard…
I wish I could tell you…but I just can’t find the words

So let’s move across the ocean
And pitch the tent stakes wide
You be the one to come after me
And I will be your bride…
I wish I could tell you…but I just can’t find the words

I am all at once courageous
I am all at once afraid
It came over me like nightfall
Like a freight train
I can’t seem to hold it in
But I can’t seem to run away

You came in without notice
And settled all around my heart
Took up residence in all the places
That were vacant and dark…
I wish I could tell you…but I just can’t find the words

Springtime Indiana
You are starting to wake
And I am laden with the thoughts
Of everything I mean to say
I wish I could tell you, But I just can’t find the words.

pictures... yay!

2006-08-31T10:02:00.000-07:00

me and my girls at fuddrucker's... i just love them.

matty and me

mina, my roomie and closest companion for the next two to three years

ma, lester, val, la-la, shmeenster, me, and melly

2006-08-27T12:02:00.000-07:00

my twin... in spirit... don't you just love her??

i love chipatis

2006-08-24T15:52:00.000-07:00

today. amidst all the busyness of meetings on overseas bank accounts, reading books of my future home, and closing my eyes so tightly just so i could picture all the beauty and suffering in my mind, i just wanted to be there. i wanted to be there to spread wide the arms of my Father and give endless hugs and share endless tales of His love with these unknown. i wanted to sit down and speak swahili, eat chipatis, and spend countless hours bonding over tears and laughter. it looks as if it will be another eight to nine months until i will be there, until i can finally hear their stories, witness their heartache, and share stories of the one love that will not let us go. oh, my heart is being broken again, and it is a most refreshing thing. yes, it is good, so very good, to know this love that just won't seem to loosen its hold on me.